Tools for Change
Introduction: How to Get the Most from the
Following Tools
The Fellowship of the Dream is an integrated program. If
you use any of the following tools in an isolated way, you may
do some good. But if you use them together, along with
the ongoing support and other strategies, you are likely to do
ten or a hundred times more good. The difference between
the two approaches is like the difference between grinding
seeds into flour, and planting the seeds to get a huge
harvest. Or it is like the difference between a boxer
who must put a lot of force into each punch, and keep
punching, and a martial arts expert who can deflect many
attacks with very little force, by harmonizing with all of the
attacks using one single pattern. The Eight
Lane Highway strategy is our pattern that harmonizes with
the many different demands and problems of life. Use it
and you will benefit yourself and others tremendously.
(Note: Some of these are also in
PDF format for easy printing. To open PDF files, you
must first have or download the free Adobe
Document Reader.)
Goal & Growth Group Format This small
group format gives group members ongoing personal support,
feedback and insight. Members share their learning, plans and efforts to change, and their recent appreciations of life.
Buddy System Basics The Buddy System is a simple, regular check-in, usually by phone, with someone else
who is
interested in getting personal support on their goals and plans.
This resource contains tips gleaned from
years of experience.
CLEAR
Action Menu This is a list of some
actions to choose from that are sorted into the five CLEAR
areas. Each area is divided into three categories:
tasks, projects and "habits, skills and ongoing
relationships." PDF
version.
Wise Giving of Time and Money Learn how to make your
donations and volunteer work do much more good! This
resource is best used with a small group that discusses your
reasons for giving, and your experiences with good and bad
charities. Then the group members research some
excellent charities so that you can multiply the good that you
do many times over! PDF
version.
Skills
Path Management This is a lifestyle management framework
that is based on
the question, "What is the best, most loving use of my time
right now?"
Want Management Learn why Want Management is
more powerful than most time management methods. Use the
Want Management framework and exercise to simplify and focus your life.
A Few Tips on Listening Well
A short one-page piece on empathic listening (sometimes called
active listening.) This is considered by many
counselors and psychologists to be the core communication
skill.
Guidelines for Giving Feedback
This is a wonderful and valuable reprint from a trainer of
trainers.
Integrating Communication Skills
A 16-page overview of listening and obstacles to good
listening. It presents four communication skills:
Attending, Active Listening, Empathic Listening and
Encountering
-- all with exercises. PDF
version.
Misery to Happiness Exercise
This four-page exercise with worksheet is one you can use
again and again to get a handle on emotional patterns that sap
your energy and interfere with joyful living. PDF
version
Useful Forms
Life Pact Form This life tool allows you to summarize all
your goals, plans and support methods. We suggest setting goals in
four-month cycles. You can make specific plans on copies of the Dream
and Goal Sheet below, and then summarize all your goals on this form.
PDF version.
Goal or Dream Sheet A worksheet for
defining a goal and then creating a plan for it. One
page PDF version. Two-page PDF
version.
CLEAR Form
PDF format This sheet can
be used weekly to set goals and then assess your efforts. In
each box, you can place your goals above the colored line, and
your results below the line.
Assessments
Lifestyle Review (pdf version.) This general life review can be used for whole-life
review, or the
most recent 4-6
months. It covers seventeen facets of life, your personal mission, your
current greatest obstacle, and then it asks you to look ahead..
Ecological Lifestyle Assessment This 10-page
assessment covers the basics in ten areas: personal health,
personal relationships, mental health, your community, your
non-personal relationships, the environment, the economy,
politics, raising children and spirituality. It is
ecological in the fullest sense of the word because it focuses
on all our life-support systems. PDF
version.
Helping
Inventory This four-page assessment helps
you focus on the many different ways you help or affect others.
PDF version.
The Well Analogy
This exercise uses the image of a water well to help
you focus on your personal vitality and your mission in
life. It also helps you diagnose the obstacles that get in
your way. This exercise helps you
visualize your situation dynamically. PDF
version.
Choices Regarding the Empowerment of
Others When people do any good action,
they are making choices or assumptions about what is
worthwhile and what approach is good for them. This
assessment will make you aware of 22 sets of choices
available to you. You can increase the breadth and
quality of your actions phenomenally, by taking this
assessment, and then reflecting on your current choices. You
can even do better by doing the assessment and then discussing
them with a group of like-minded people. PDF
version.
Useful Links These are a small
assortment of links for learning more about making wise
donations, becoming politically empowered, having an impact on
the economy, and living more ecologically.